Monday, December 1, 2008

The Side Piece

Me: How's thing with you and wifey?
Friend : She good, But I'm with my side shorty right now.
Me: I thought you was getting out the game?
Friend: I was, but my side shorty make me appreciate wifey more

After reading those lines I know my female readers are in rage right now, while the guy readers are probably saying "Word, True, True". I believe at one point man or woman we've all had that side piece in our life whether it were for financial gain, emotional support or strictly for physical pleasure, However the side piece while fulfilling for the time being never results in the outcome you were looking for. NOBODY in life is comfortable with being 2nd or background to another person, although there are a select few who are cool with that, Not sure I understand the logic in that but to each it's own. Fabolous rapped about it, Bill Clinton brought it to the white house even arguably the greatest civil rights leader of our time Dr. Martin Luther king was guilty of it. Myself as most young men am guilty of keeping the side piece around for odd number of reasons mostly for selfish reasons. Don't get me wrong woman are just as guilty of this. With the blog I want to cover three basis, What a side piece is?, how to determine if you're a side piece and how to get rid of an side piece.

What is a Side Piece?
A side piece can defined in many ways, a man/or woman who isn't your boyfriend or girlfriend but are around for the aforementioned reasons(Financial,Emotional support or Sex). A side piece is can be relationship material but you know you never want to be in a relationship with that person, majority of the time a side piece doesn't realize that they are a side piece until they are either told or the picture begins to get clear. Telling a person that your involved is usually the safest and easiest way to have a side piece, that way they know there boundaries and each party can basically get what they want out of the situation, 99.9% of the time this transition doesn't go this smooth for two reasons A) Said side piece begins to catch feelings and want to step out of their role as side piece and be your mate B) You realize why this person is your side piece and why the relationship never progressed into anything more. Reason A can be a very dangerous situation (See: "Fatal Attraction"). In 2004 I met my girl friend at the time and was heavily involved with her but yet I couldn't shake my S.P.(Let's call her "Loca") So I kept "Loca" around for monetary reasons and for physical pleasure after a while I realized that this "Fling" was growing tiring and I couldnt hurt the woman I loved anymore, I broke the news to "Loca", she said "I'm cool with that decision and I wish you two the best", I thought that would be the last time I spoke with "Loca", only to realize "Loca" was about to involve herself in my life more than I could imagine. "Loca" began to create multiple AIM handles, Phone #'s and Create several myspace pages to stalk myself and others in my life. "Loca" told me in a phone conversation "If I cant have you no one else will". It's been three years since I told "Loca" I wanted no parts of her and she still has found a way to contact me although not as frequent she still does, so in the end a deep Lesson was learned here, If you ready for the excitement of a S.P also be ready for the disturbing side of a S.P

How to determine if your a side Piece?

I saw an away msg today that cracked me the hell up. "Should I continue to talk to someone who wants to be single?" I wanted to write something to that person like damn maam you've been Side Pieced but I left it alone. Chances are if you've been talking to a someone for more than three months and the only places you've been are to the motel, a friends bedroom or the backseat of a hooptie you are a sidepiece, not saying those are the only signs of being a sidepiece but those might be the main signs. Other key things to look for when determining if your a side piece or not are A)Communication B)Locations and C)Visibility.
Webster defines communication as the successful conveying or sharing of ideas. The main way to tell if your a side piece is if you and said person never speak or when conversation is engaged, it is short, or during awkward periods (i.e Early morning 11pm -4am,Drunken moments, or Immense sexual cravings). The key to any successful S.P is to never get to close with that person, which means never revealing personal thoughts, engaging in heart felt conversations, basically anything done with your ACTUAL relationship mate should never be done with a side piece.

Location is very important in dealing with a side piece you should never bring a side peice places you've taken your mate because in the end it can lead to trouble(Waiter Might identify you, or might bump into people you know). Most side pieces are happy just to be around because they are finally getting to see you whether you are chillin on your block drinking some wavy juice or at at applebees for a low budget dinner.


This might be the most important symbol regarding whether your are a sidepiece or not. If you've never met any of said person's friends or family or if said person always choose to go to remote locations or keep you indoors you might be a side piece. I mean in the rare occasion that said person does take you watch for certain mannerism such as distance or affectionate gestures if there is none than can mean you are a side piece.

How to get rid of Sidepiece?

The answer to this is to not to get involved with a side piece. The outcome will do nothing but create a headache that is not needed. If caught you risk losing the side piece and the person you are in the relationship with so in the end it is basically a lose-lose situation. Once the trust is lost with the person you care about in the relationship you will look at the side piece in disgust and regret all dealings with that person, so avoid the risk at all cost.

This blog was in no way to incriminate myself, "Share secrets", everything I stated was basically common knowledge I just wanted to make a blog most can relate too and see the feedback.....


Everyday Jane Dope. said...

Lol! I fucks wit you.
Fortunately, for you you seem to have mastered the tricks of the trade. Some of these dirty dick niggas however, are sloppy with theirs.
In all honestly, i found myself caught out there before. I guess technically i was something like a side piece, although dude eventually did try to pursue a relationship with me. I guess he thought i'd be the SP, until he himself caught feeling and wanted to have his cake and eat it to. Personally, i dont think i will ever grow accustomed to this phenomenon. If you're happy, Fuck are you cheating for? And when they BOTH dead you, you dudes tend to play the bitch role, shed tears (DONT FRONT for the cameras ) and put up statuses/aways talking bout "my heart is gone"
I myself am a habitual cheater but only in the defensive. My greatest concern is my health. A man in himself is a form of STD if you ask me lol, poking two pussies at the same time in many instances in the same DAY. So let me ask you this "playa's" lol, when the cats away and the mouse wants to come out to play, is SHE justified?... don't fall under the false pretense that you're the only one getting it in. A woman's intuition is something like a sixth sense...
"When you're feelin' good in somebody's spot
Gettin' hot, don't stop
Just don't think I'm not
Cause I'm out gettin' mine"

You struck a nerve Jordan Holmes lol, pssh NIGGAS!

Cyndy said...

You made a lot of true and good points about side pieces...I never had one nor was I ever a S.P. If I'm with someone then you already know that he is satisfying me in every aspect of the relationship...But a lot of people are in denial because they think they are not an S.P. When everyone else in the world knows exactly what the deal is. I guess if u don't want to be a S.P. then u shouldnt put yourself out there whether its for any reason. As for the heels part of this blog....I personally don't wear heels but I am open to the wearing heels at bedtime *wink wink* lol...I still look good wearing anything on this body...cynz Destiny signing out

100K said...

my son writing the manuscripts of the game!!

JOY said...

Men disgust me.Honestly, this makes me hate men more.That convo with your friend disgusting!

A Genius said...

Word. I've never had a side joint for real because if it comes to that point...I'll keep everybody on the side. I'm not trying to be on creep when I go out. DC is far too small for that shit. I can't go on that "makes you appreciate wifey more" shit. If you don't appreciate your girl to the max already then you need to not be with her.

And yea...getting rid of any girl you used to tap is hard as shit.

Kofi Bofah said...


I like your style, rookie.

JOY: You should not be disgusted by men.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this Genius "I've never had a side joint for real because if it comes to that point...I'll keep everybody on the side. I can't go on that "makes you appreciate wifey more" shit. If you don't appreciate your girl to the max already then you need to not be with her. "

What a sad, pathetic world we live in, where cheating is spoken about in such a non-chalant manner. That it is an everyday occurence and so ubiquitous is truly depressing.

If you have ever experienced the emotions that go along with being cheated on, and how it messes with you on a psychological level as well, you should NEVER hope to inflict that pain upon anybody (unfortunately that is not the case). It forces people to distrust even the most trustworthy of individuals, which is a real tradgedy in our world of ever diminishing honesty. People are paying for other peoples' mistakes, and turning once openhearted individuals into paranoid lovers who will never let anybody get to truly know them. And yet, oftentimes, it is these very people that have felt the pain (Everyday Jane Dope) that are so quick to inflict it upon others, if only to save their own hearts from being crushed by beating their partner to what they assume will be the "inevitable punch." They hurt others as a means to protect their own hearts, which in no way justifies their actions. In fact, it almost makes them worse, because they have been in that position, and they make a concious choice to put others in that horrible place. What they really need to do is work on the type of individuals they choose to date, their ability to communicate with their partner, and their own selves.

Regardless of WHY someone cheats, it is NEVER justified. I say, what comes around goes around, and if you plan to break hearts, plan to have yours broken. And then, break the cycle, and treat your partner how they deserve to be treated, or don't be with them at all.

Adwoa said...

"The key to any successful S.P is to never get to close with that person, which means never revealing personal thoughts, engaging in heart felt conversations, basically anything done with your ACTUAL relationship mate should never be done with a side piece..."

I kind of disagree..I feel once sex is involved, esp on more than one occasion...there is going to be somthing there.
No matter how much you want to deny..I believe a connection has been established. It just might be quicker for (effin)..however you want to put it) is not just a can't just buy and go..once you've shared something that intimate...boom! connection!

Adwoa said...

..I think it's the same thing for emotional can you have a S.P. for emotional support and not catch feelings?? That's like saying jump without moving...

..with the financial reason...I think that's definitely something you can do without catching feelings or having a connection...or not?

Anonymous said...

good shit broke it down for these broads

-Free PicknRoll

Che Che said...

I would have to say that I agree with the fact that if you need a side piece for any reason then you really shouldnt be with the your significant other. Having a side piece at all is just a way of asking for more problems and drama because a majority of the time it never ends well. When you start dealing with someone feelings always come whether its from the start or it gradually comes about, but it will come. Once its there someone in the end will end up being hurt and even though people claim they dont wana hurt their girl/man or the s.p., they will end up doing it either when things come to light or when it comes to the point when you have to let the s.p. go.